The 'Last Frontier'

So dear readers after many posts in a row that lack a good amount fun, I have decided, rather then bore you, I would compile a few things which are happening around the Northern Territory.

“KILL THEM ALL Victim’s Grandad calls for every croc to be shot dead” ~ NT News Cover 2nd April 09

Despite a late season tropical monsoon, the gang embarks on a lovely picnic. The day after swimming in the lake at said picnic area, some two hundred metre's from the croc infested ocean, the local news reports wondering croc's captured in area. In my defense, I really needed to pee and swimming was easier than public facilities.


“DUI mum was breastfeeding at wheel” ~ NT News, Cover 6th April 09... Nuff said.

Israeli special forces troop spotted in the top end, or is that Jesus himself?

“14 people bashed in NT each day… and that’s GOOD NEWS – last year it was 15” – NT News Cover 7th April 09

Gone are the days of global domination and evil axis, no it would seem modern Germany is much more concerned with Australia’s well being and financial future as thousands arrive by boat. Squandering great riches of delicious Euro’s, young Germans arrive on Australian shores with only one prerogative. With them they bring various cassettes labelled ‘Nena’. But be warned, these dubbed tapes generally do not contain the once loved classic; 99 Luftballons, instead, they are encrypted with various beats played in rhythmic regularity known to cause severe cases of insomnia. Once played, usually by sheer trickery, a German will reach maximum disco within minutes. Such symptoms to look out for are: violent body convulsion, eye’s rolling back into there head and a parched mouth. Australians are advised that it is extremely difficult to diffuse a German once in 'trance', and are advised to feed infected patients with copious amounts of cheap beer whihc they will consume feverishly… Eventually the patient will become restless, fall over and hopefully pass out. If symptoms persist, or you grow impatient with the treatment, users are advised that a gentle ‘clonk’ across the head with a semi weight love stone should speed recovery.
Below is a demonstration of what a patient should look like after treatment…(Note: Bottle used to speed recovery - Improvise)

“Croc Bait anglers put new spin on stupidity” ~ NT News page 5, 7th April 09

"Hopa hopa"